Thank you so much. I have messaged you. 
  
Stickman, Midnight and Big Red are all Craps terminology. The craps stick man handles the bets, calls out the rolls and gives the dice back to the shooter. Midnight is 6+6 = 12, which is a losing roll like snake eyes. While, Big Red is the winning roll - a seven.

Thanks for your effort; saved me a ton of words.

Hi. Thank you for sharing the poem. I'd be glad to help out the best I can.

1. I wouldn't call it jarring at all. Usually, I think it's a good idea to stick to a single ongoing metaphor, but in this case, to be honest, I didn't even notice it.
2. There's nothing wrong with being abstract- it just depends on what you were going for. As your reader, I couldn't really tell what you were trying to convey in this poem. I know how it made me feel, but it wasn't exactly obvious what you felt, or how you wanted me to feel. Which could be okay, I think, if that's what you wanted. As for classification, I'm not sure what you mean. I guess you'd say it's a lyrical poem (as opposed to narrative or dramatic)- it doesn't tell a story but instead opens a window into the poet's (you, obvs) mind to show the reader what you are thinking or feeling at a given moment, using emotional, sensory language to describe the scene and/or subject. Is that what you were looking for? Sorry if that doesn't help.
3. 

Hi, Thank you for taking the time to read my little poem here. I am actually working on how to get better at poetry and I have some questions about this if you'd like to consider:  
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1. Is the merging of dice-related terms and nature imagery jarring? Does the whole piece feel cohesive and natural or forced?  

2. My poetic tendency is to lean more towards the abstract and I am working to get the concrete in. How would you classify this poem?  

3. Could you please tell me what bits you didn’t like?  

4. I know the poem is ambiguous, but I am still interested to know how you interpret it. Also, would you like this piece more if I had mentioned more details in it, or is this the right amount of ambiguity for you?  

5. I would really appreciate any other constructive point you might have.  

	 
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Thank you. I would be very grateful if you can provide me with further insight.

I don’t really understand everything that this poem is about, but that didn’t stop me from enjoying it. Your use of language is superb, and I like all of the dice-related terms you’ve woven into the poem. I’m going to have to read this again, and again. And again. It is a poem that seems to get better each time I do.

There is enough intelligence demonstrated in your poem that I'm confident that you know where all the weaknesses are. There are many as you try to swerve above the serious undertaking of your poem. Don't allow yourself to be a skater; take the risk of saying the right things badly at first. Title is excellent. Big Red is winning though could be expressed much more effectively. Most of the editing process is undoing the places - most the the poem - where you let yourself off the hook and evade the subject. That ability may only be available to you with the distance of years. My poem Fourteen Hour Snow on AllPOetry (Smithy9) is in its fifieth year of revisions as I try my best to stop bullshitting myself. Poetry was given to man so we can keep digging the same hole. There's are no lines between the title and the last line that's real poetry, that gutsy and honest, but your facility with language deserves some respect. Read David Ignatow's poem Each Day if you want to know what gutsy and 

Thank you for your comments. I do have the commitment to craft and would really value your detailed critique.

Ten years from now you will have gained enough distance to turn this into an outstanding poem. Right now the poem suffers from fluff that undermines its more serious intent.

This strikes me as poeticizing:

The Stickman failed at our prayers  
once, but after the Midnight rolls —  
between the cracks in the crickets'  
last song, you will hear my small voice  
calling out to you — answer back.

Big Red is a great ending.

Open comment: anyone on Reddit interested in becoming a serious poet , i.e., writing well enough to publish in print, should open a free AllPoetry account. It's the next step up from Reddit which strikes me as the home of the teen angst poem. And all the laxity that implies. AllPoetry is a hotbed of failure too but the failure there takes as its starting point publishable poetry. Probably the single most useful suggestion I can make; seems pointless to me to criticize individual poems since I don't think the authors here have the resources or personal commitment to craft that makes critique more than wasted breath. But the Reddit poem has fluency in its favor and that's no small thing. Next step: learn what a poem is.

Thank you for your comments, you have given me a few things to think about.

Craps and puddles is more than a mixed metaphor; puddles is entirely off subject. Strongest suggestion: get back on topic, stop poeticizing and do the hard work of exploring the promise your title holds. Btw, there's a better title than Craps but Craps is a good place to start. Chris below nailed it; though the poem opens and closes with promise, the subject is dodged throughout. Not a criticism in the usual sense; I see your ability. But don't take your pedal off the gas or give yourself an out bcz you can blow smoke in our eyes. Not meant negatively. It takes time, years, to be honest with oneself. I've been at it for fifty years and its still an everyday challenge. Or read an Amanda Gorman poem and think what a load of crap.


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

Years shall tumble by  
like dice rolling down a steep road.  
Snake-eyed when it stumbles into a pothole —  
look back at yourself in that puddle:  
you will see the world anew:  
a world after the rains, after the quibbling  
clouds hush away under a moon-slung sky,  
after the boughs fold away their last cradle.  
&amp;nbsp;  
The Stickman failed at our prayers  
once, but after the Midnight rolls —   
between the cracks in the crickets'  
last song, you will hear my small voice  
calling out to you — answer back.  
'Cause this time I bet  
we shall roll and have our Big Red.  
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[1](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y4gzsk/comment/isn6a1a/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3) [2](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y8jxcu/comment/it1tk5r/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)