I will definitely work more on this one. Thanks for your suggestions!

Hi! I really enjoyed the first stanza of this poem particularly. The imagery you create with those lines is great. At first I had trouble figuring out what exactly you were talking about, but now I see how you used the old trope of using the door to pull your teeth out. I think that’s a great visualization and makes it feel more visceral and painful when I think about it. The rest of the poem is good as well, all together I like the slight feeling of urgency, or maybe panic? Over a deadline. It’s incredibly relatable.

I think to improve it, focus on how it sounds when you say it aloud. How does the rhythm feel to you? The first stanza has a great flow to it, but the others feel a bit broken up. And maybe that’s intentional! I can see how it would fit and it’s a great way to show progression from collected and in-step to more disjointed.

I love short poems, and I appreciate how you were able to convey your feelings with a simple image, using only a few words. The first stanza is powerful. 

I noticed how you used rythme at the beginning of the poem but not at the end? I don’t think rythmes are necessary, but maybe I’d try to add one at the end to create symmetry. 

I also think the line cut on “my job is to / fit the fragments” is a bit awkward.
Would the flow be better if you wrote “My job is to fit / the fragments”. This way, the fragment would be fragmented in their own line.

Hello! I enjoyed this poem very much. I think it conveys the feeling of resilience, of pushing past adversity. 

To improve it, I would say try to be consistent with the rhymes. If you choose to use them in one place, then I think they should be also used in other places. 

Other than that, I really enjoyed this poem! It’s simple but conveys your message incredibly.

I'm a big fan of short poems and I'm really enjoying how clearly you've painted a very biting (pun intended haha) visual in the first line. 

The theme of alluding to a pulled tooth (and in the last stanzas having to put that broken tooth back together) is clever. 

Similar to previous comments I would focus on the rythme/timing of the poetry. The last two stanzas (most noticable the last) seem somewhat abrupt. You could potentially use the same rhyming format as the first stanza with the others to make it more cohesive or add another line to the last stanzas for symmetry. Either way, great work!


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Tie my mind in a knot  
and slam the door shut  
to tear out the loose thoughts  

my job is to  
fit the fragments  
back together  

however jagged  
I simply must 

[I am Not](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y98dsk/i_am_not/)
[Hope](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y9g7ru/hope/)

Deadline