Wow, what a through review! Thank you so much! I’ll give your critiques some thinking

Hi there! Really enjoyed this fantasy/ mythological theme that seems to represent an architypical story of the slayer of a dragon/ beast. A George and the Dragon type story. Its also nice to see some rhyming poetry done rhythmically and well. Genuinely enjoyed reading this a few times over.

My criticism is that the meter in a rhyming poem like this should be a bit tighter/ considered here and there. There's also some passages here and there that could use a stronger word or could be consider revision.

Line 6: I think this should be "The day kinsmen died" connecting to the reference to kinsmen later and and replacing the weak word, many.

Line 8: this line is preceeded by line 7 which has two anapaestic feet. I feel like line 8 should mirror that too to give a rhythm, perhaps: When it came to (the/ its) feast. But I can also see the argument of ending on an iamb, as you've done in the poem, as it ends the stanza more solidly. But thought I'd add this in to think about.

Line 9&10: "Th


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The knight is a lie!  
The knight is a lie,  
A truth I realized  
With tear-stained eyes  

He never came nigh  
The day many died  
In the maw of the beast  
When it came to feast  

The blood of them that day  
Harrows my heart in a way  
I will never sleep, nor have peace  
Until the beast lay still at my feet  

That is why it needs be  
I must risk life and steed  
To slay the dragon that besiege  
Kith, kin, stranger, and me  

Though the knight is a lie  
Those I love lament why  
I commit the great sin  
Taking the place of him  
They still believe in the lie  
Not I, not I  

I taketh my sword  
Pray my shied stands true  
My mind’s eye pointed to  
The terrible task I must do  
And today I ride  
To prove a legend or die  

For the knight is a lie  
The knight was always a lie  
He was never true  
So naive me must do  


[Critique 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y80k1d/it_means_a_lot/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf)

[Critique 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yb3b8j/apple_blossoms_1st_poem_d/itegwg4/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf&amp;context=3)

The Knight is a Lie