I really liked your poem. It has a touch of nostalgia in its verses and I feel like it shares a desire to escape. Beautiful!

Beautiful attempt! I interpret it as a man's quest for happiness, when it is in the moment.

However, in some places the rhyme seems forced, and there seems some unintended repetition.

Keep writing!


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

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“I soared through a cloud 

My Thoughts went off to a different place

As I wonder by myself away 

Was there a tomorrow 

Or am I to forever stay?  

A shadow that looked of a person appeared 

Told me to look no further but see whats hidden away 

My hands trembled as I stood there speechless 

I then realized that this person was a mirror of my own imagination

Suddenly my eyes awake 

I learned that to grow I must understand and stay 

How I dreamed of a place not so far away”


https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yd53ly/deaths_silence/itqypcw/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf&amp;context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yd4j1z/to_save_myself_i_let_you_destroy_me/itqyivo/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf&amp;context=3

A Found Soul