This feels very raw. It made me consider encounters I've had with women and what might have been going on in their minds. And at the same time I identified with the writer's voice, seeing their only value in providing sexual gratification. Thanks for sharing this, I hope we both come realise more and more that just by being we are enough.

I really enjoyed this. I love the Icarus comparison, I love your word choice. The parallel in the first and last stanza is also done well.

To improve even further I’d suggest experimenting with line breaks and making your grammar consistent.


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

 

Icarus

each time i fly too close to the sun others step back and wait for fireworks   
adore the beauty in the destruction, the sparks, and the ashes in the aftermath   
they long for the fiery passion, the thoughtless actions

Trading attention for the blatant disregard of my body   
“Don't worry you can do what you want to me later”

Without my hypersexuality there's no way to pay you for caring   
No way to make myself worth your time 

There is no amount of apologies and thank-yous that equate to your body against mine

but when i fly too close to the sun you make me a bed in the clouds   
there is no more falling and burning and basking in the wreckage   
There is only love

&amp;#x200B;

&amp;#x200B;

Links

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yypi15/comment/iwvgeys/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yypi15/comment/iwvgeys/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yyi1ng/comment/iwvh9b4/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/yyi1ng/comment/iwvh9b4/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)