VirginiaStepMonster

Having an issue that you just want a quick vent about and not an entire post? This is the place! This daily post is not very active, but it's a great place for a quick vent .

Having an issue that you just want a quick vent about and not an entire post? This is the place! This daily post is not very active, but it's a great place for a quick vent .

Hi there,

We're facing a bit of a dilemma and I'm not sure of the best way to tackle this in the safety section of mod tools. We have competing forces that are making the tools nearly useless.

We have had, for years now, a consistent pattern of automatic downvotes. This is very visible on posts. If you review r/stepparents by new, you can see quite a few posts sitting at 0. This includes daily automated posts that are rarely interacted with. Even further annoying is that posts that are in the mod queue for manual review are often sitting at 0 as well. This is counteracted by posts that have garnered a lot of comments, but the issue as I see it is that posts that are automatically downvoted

Hi folks,

We've been receiving reports of a particular user sending some pretty obnoxious DMs today. While we are able to take action so the user is not able to comment here anymore, we cannot stop them from sending you shitty DMs. Only reddit can do that. And if enough people report them, their account will be suspended. Please keep in mind, we have some pretty determined trolls here. A lot of the time even after a suspension or ban from reddit, they come right back under a different name doing the same thing.

So after you reach out to us via mod mail and let us know someone is harassing you and what their user name is, the next step is reporting to Reddit admins. From [support.reddithel

I'm sure many of you have heard of the impending shutdown of a few third party apps - and the upcoming blackout that many subs will be participating in. Reddit CEO Steve Huffman has provided an AMA that you can read. There's a lot to take in, but the long and short of it is that Reddit is asking third party app developers to move to a paid tier of their API. That's totally fair, but what the developers are struggling with is the way in which Reddit is going about it, the potential astronomical costs, and the fact that Reddit is giving them 30 days to get moved over. And, perhaps, some dupli

We hear some talk around these parts about mini-wives, and how difficult they are to manage. So let's open up the floor and talk about it.

This is an uncomfortable subject for many folks, and some people feel very passionately about it. What I'd like to do here is pull back the covers and examine this.

So let's really talk about it.

The entire theory of mini-wives/mini-husbands is a misconception and erroneous presentation of parentification. It puts the onus of the learned behavior of a child to manage their parents emotions on to the child, instead of on the parent where it rightly belongs.

The issue isn't that the child wants to be Daddy's wife or Mommy's husband, the issue is that th

Hey guys,

Looking through the daily posts, there's not a lot of traction on them. Back in the day, Today's Tiny Problem was a pretty active thread that got a lot of attention, but it's barely used in the last year or so. Today's Tiny Tribute gets even less traction. There's also a Friday Off Topic Thread that is rarely used.

So what could we do better here? Do you find the posts just aren't useful? Is there something else you'd like to see on a daily basis? What about weekly posts outside of the rule reminder? We're going to have a new Saferbot reminder that will go out every Sunday wi

Ever get conflicted by the role you are supposed to take according to strangers on reddit? Me too! Like, am I a parent or am I not a parent? Do I count or don't I count? When do I count?

The amount of conflicting statements I have read is pretty wild. And if I didn't have a pretty solid handle on my role in my SD's life, I'd probably be spinning around in circles wondering if there's something wrong with me. Truth is, there's not. There's a lot of bullshit out there, and a lot of the bullshit conflicts with other bullshit.

Let's take a look at some of the standard bullshit people toss out at stepparents.

Stepparent: I feel like my partner is really taking advantage of time by constan

I know, I know, I told you guys a month ago I was going to do this. Listen, things got crazy with work, Animal Crossing came out with a new update, and the bot needed some attention. I got... busy ;)

As promised though, we've done some clean up on our private sub and are now accepting applications to join.

The rules for acceptance are pretty straight forward:

1. You must be a stepparent to be approved. No exceptions.
2. You must be a frequent contributor of r/stepparents in good standing.
3. You must be a visible member of r/stepparents for more than three months.
4. You are willing to abide by the rules of the private sub, which are even stricter than the rules here.

Hey Stepparents,

If you've been here for awhile, you are aware of the existence of Saferbot on our sub. If you aren't aware, we break it down in the wiki. Take a moment to review it!

Due to harassment from users of r/AmITheDevil, we have now added it to the list. This means that if you are commenting there, you will be banned. We do have an appeals process and we do generally overturn bans when someone reaches out to us in good faith.

If you are a stepparent and you've been caught up in the ban, and you want the support that this community offers, reach out to the mod team. If you can show us where on reddit you are discussing being a

Good morning, stepparents!

I hope you are having as peaceful of a weekend as possible. I am currently sipping some coffee, scrolling through the modqueue, and contemplating the state of the daily posts and the outrageous immediate downvoting we are subject to.

So let's talk first about the downvotes, k? The downvotes are not a reflection of you personally. I guarantee when this post hits, it's going to be immediately downvoted. Why? You know, who knows why people do the things they do, but here we are. It just happens. I can offer up some speculation, but if you are a regular here, I think you already know my thoughts on this.

Most of the time, the downvoting sorts itself out as normal r

Hi Stepparents!

Every now and again we get requests from members of the community to help them when someone has begun stalking them on Reddit or has identified them. We've had at least one instance where the stepmom's contributions here have been used in a court custody case, and not in a favorable way. We've had an instance where the biomom reached out to the mod team to complain that the stepmom was pretending to be her and exaggerating the story to make her look bad. Many folks have reached out to us to say so and so is BM and is harassing them.

In most cases there is little the mod team can do. To be perfectly transparent, users are as anonymous to us as they are to you. We cannot see

tl;dr: I got money, I can't refund it, support is not very supportive, and I seem to have an extra few hundred dollars that I'm wary of because there is no way to refund it.

In June I got a notification about a transaction from a stranger that required me to do something to receive the money. One of those "click here" things. I ignored it, because I get those a lot and they eventually expire. I was an EARLY adopter of cashtag and have a very simple, very elegant cashtag. I get strangers accidentally sending me funds and asking for a refund all the time, along with the "Further action is required to accept this payment" nonsense. I refund the accidental sends, and ignore the "further action"

I say "note" but it's a really long read. I've provided a nice little tl;dr for you if you don't want to read the entire thing, but as with all announcements, it's kind of helpful if you do.

tl;dr

• Reddit is a giant place, we are just a tiny part of the overall ecosystem
• Use the report button
  • Do not create meta posts complaining about the state of the sub
  • Do not send direct messages to any single mod regarding something happening on the sub
  • Do not send a chat message to any single mod regarding something happening on the sub
  • **If you want to talk to us abou

Hi there,

We have a filter to remove a good majority of AITA related questions and comments, but since I suck with regex, posts squeak past it routinely.

Current:

body+title (includes-word, regex): ["aita", "wibta", "(would i be|am i|i'm)[ ](the|an|a)[ ](asshole|ahole|ass)", "r/aita", "r/amitheasshole"]

This catches "am i the asshole" "would I be the asshole if", "my partner says i'm an asshole" etc, but it doesn't catch "am I a huge asshole if". I could just add "asshole" in by itself, but I would like to actually learn something here and keep it clean.

Additionally, how would I filter a comment that STARTS with "info"? We remove any of the standard AITA terms, but I'd also like