everydaycry

I have got ky water based lubricant, shower wash, low lint cloth, pure corn starch baby powder, and vasoline. Are they compatible to TPE doll? Also are cleaning douche, aquarium pump, baby oil and tpe gel neccessary?

My plan

1. Take a shower with the doll and use a shower wash with my finger to wash the vaginal and anal cavity.
2. Wipe the doll with a low lint cloth to dry the exterior part of the doll.
3. Stick the tampon inside the vaginal and anal part.
4. Apply vasoline and then starch baby powder to the doll (not sure do I do this on vaginal and anal part too, if I applied them to the cavity, do I need to rinse the cavity with water before next use to flush away the corn starch and

How do you determine if the cloth will stain the doll? I am wondering if the cloth of my choice with a material of black 95% cotton and 5% elastine jersey fabric will stain my doll. I notice there is some lint coming out in the cloth, is it safe to put them on to the doll after rolling with a lint remover?

How so you select them?

How do you select them?

I am currently looking for these models but I am not sure if the vendor is legit or not

1. Sara-7.38lb Soft Liquid Jelly Small Ass Torso
2. Zenobia-29.76lb Lifelike Gel-filled Female Torso Sex Doll
3. Lorna-11lb 5 Vibrating & Sucking Modes Big Ass Masturbator I cant find them in most of the big brand sextoy seller like Loveshop, Stagshop and PinkyCherry. They seems to have limited option and very few description about their product.

I am currently looking for these models but I am not sure if the vendor is legit or not

1. Sara-7.38lb Soft Liquid Jelly Small Ass Torso
2. Zenobia-29.76lb Lifelike Gel-filled Female Torso Sex Doll
3. Lorna-11lb 5 Vibrating & Sucking Modes Big Ass Masturbator I cant find them in most of the big brand sextoy seller like Loveshop, Stagshop and PinkyCherry. They seems to have limited option and very few description about their product.

There is nothing keep me from suicide. All the things I can do are meaningless and I have tried everything desperate to survive but I just cant live with what I have right now. Seriously, what can I do? I know talking wont help. I dont want to die but it seems it is the only way out for me and it is the only thing meaningful for everyone I know. They feel happier without my existance. I dont want to play with cognitive behaviorial therapy as I am tired to explain my evidence.