gimmickybee

I just self harmed and I've never been more disappointed in myself with anything. I was dissociating and full of sadness so I hurt myself to get me out of it. It didn't and all I ended up with was a cut and even more feelings. At least the guilt got me to take a vistaril instead of cutting more, but I've never felt this bad before and I've attempted suicide 3 times. I hate myself so much.

I suffer from insomnia because of my breakup with my fiancee about 2 months ago and I had a recent crisis so I spent some time in a mental hospital. While there they upped my meds and started me on new ones, one being Trazodone for sleep, and abilify for my mood. Ever since I get some of the best sleep of my life, but I dream of me and my ex every single night. The thing is they feel so real, like I can feel things, taste things, hear things, and it's making me wake up in a sour mood because I miss what I had, and miss what could be. It makes me want to just stay asleep forever because of how happy I feel in my dreams. Another problem is that since they are so real I can't remember what was

I just want to say that I was having a pretty serious panic attack, like head hot, crying, shaking uncontrollably type panic attack, but my cat randomly decided to come lay down and sleep with me. I instantly felt so relaxed and better after he came to me. So yeah, who needs medicine when you've got a cat?

My mom adopted a cat about two years ago and we used to be best buddies while he was a kitten. In the past few months he's been less interested in me that was until I got my own kitten. Now he wants everything to do with me again and he almost acts like a kitten again. Why's this? Is he jealous or something?

I crave death. I want to hurt myself and watch me bleed. I feel so lost and alone and confused about everything. I'm afraid I just need one good dissociation and I'm done for. I'm thinking about going back into inpatient care at the hospital, but I start a new job tomorrow and I don't think I can do the job searching again after already having to quit 4 jobs because of my mental health in the last month. I don't know what I should do. I can't seem to just snap out of it like I've been able to the past few times.

I've felt so so bad recently and on a whim I decided to cut, and things just feel better? It doesn't hurt much at all and I feel better after each cut I make. I know this isn't healthy, but I feel so good after.

As someone without BPD, what can I do to help someone with BPD after I trigger them over text? I find it easier to help in person, but over text I feel like I don't really know how to calm them or what I can say to take away some worry I guess.

I've officially made it one week without any sort of contact with her or anyone around her. It's been super hard sometimes and I've really wanted to reach out, but this sub has been a huge help in reminding me she doesn't care about me. I've attended therapy, set up multiple job interviews, and I've adopted a kitten all in this time. It's time for me to finally focus on me and not her anymore.

Help me lol