[2314] Fish Upon The Sky - Prologue+Chapter One

Hi everyone!
Thank you for taking your time to read this. This is going to be my practice work, a fairly long rom-com.
Some things I’d like to know:

1. Does my choice of tense backfire on me?
2. Were you able to connect with Aaron?
3. Any weird word choices or sentence structures?
4. Any suggestions for the tagline on the banner or does it work fine?
5. Do you want to read the next chapter at all?

6. !I haven’t introduced the female MC in this chapter, I want her to make an appearance one year after what happens in the first chapter. It isn’t very long yet, so should I include it or start the new timeline afresh?!<

Edit/disclaimer/whatever: the prologue will make absolutely no sense to you. And it won’t be explained until about half the story or more. So please don’t whack your brains over it too much^ ^

I hope you like it. All kinds of thoughts are welcome.

Here’s the piece

My critiques: [1987] [944]