[988] Break Point Submission 2

Hi Y'all! Really excited to submit the second draft of my story. In this draft the sort of twist is revealed, setting the stage for the rest of the story.

I did my best to implement many of the changes suggested, including rewriting the first part to be (hopefully) less boring and explain the character's struggles more. Most of the other parts are more or less the same.

I'm not really looking for any specific feedback at the moment, just want to hear people's general impressions and what is and isn't working in the story so far. I care about all my stories, but I connect to this one on a personal level so I really want to make it as good as possible. So all feedback is welcome. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

My story:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1EOiaKkGwrHPEL5pBNXVoOwJeKzB_-Y1hSKH-9qWHbAc/edit

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Receipts:

[2296] Apricots

link:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/12nzip9/2296_apricots/

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[1616] Rumor Has It

link:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/12rrl71/1616_rumor_has_it/jh0rbmg/?context=3

[1416] The Taxidermist

link:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/134jjww/1416_the_taxidermist/jih0w1c/?context=3