[4440] Dreams' Graveyard (2nd version)
Hi, I got all the feedback and made my story clearer and better. I hope that people who stopped reading after the first paragraph last time can enjoy this new version.
As always my questions are:
-
Is everything clear?
-
What do you think the main theme is?
-
What do you think of the hook?
-
Are there any glaring mistakes in grammar?
-
Are some sentences hard to read?
-
How is the pacing of the story?
-
Any other kind of mistake you could spoAny help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.
Trigger warning: Self-harm
Dreams Graveyard Version 2: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xuwsLt5bdEPJAQ6WvjjmBXLDD54yL-s-XKeVSIZd7r0/edit?usp=sharing
Posted Aug 21, 2023, 12:47 PM UTC
115