[941] Been Meaning To; Short Story (1/3)

Hi everyone,

This is just the first part of my 3k word short story. I'm basically concerned about whether the story is hooking you enough and whether the milieu is vividly described enough. But any other comment is appreciated.

[941] Been Meaning To 1/3

Thank you for taking the time to look at my work.

My crits:

[1200] The Secret

[491] Action Man