[2406] Web Serial Prologue (fantasy/regression/progression)
Crits: 154, 297, 108, 375, 3449
This is the prologue to a web serial I'm developing (still several months from launch, but coming along well enough that I would like some general reader opinions on it). There's still at least one revision pass before launch, but it's been worked on extensively already. I am interested in one thought in particular in addition to general critique if you'd be so kind:
Specifically, I feel like this story may straddle too many lines to release it anywhere comfortably (or maybe less cynically put... I'm not sure what to do with it besides writing it) -- it's maybe a little literary/overwritten for RR despite being on genre there and contrary to the pace of this prologue it's a bit of a long burn, it's a weird genre for more conventional publishing and just to add insult to injury a core motivating factor for the main character is an M/M relationship, although it's not like the main point of the narrative. Curious if RR readers feel it's too wordy, or fantasy novel readers feel it's too weird.
General thoughts on how it works as a prologue and if you'd read farther (and what you'd expect) would also be very valuable
Anyway here it is, thanks!
Posted Mar 4, 2026, 7:43 PM UTC