What life tips for idiots would you contribute to "The Idiots Guide to Life"?
Posted Sep 8, 2014, 10:17 PM UTC
3451
[First pants, THEN shoes.] (http://www.lechatnoirboutique.com/prodimages/Coffee%20Mug%20-%20Far%20Side%20First%20Pants%20Then%20Your%20Shoes.jpg)
11
We miss you, Gary Larson. Please come back.
4
If you're starting a new job and your name is Toblerone, just place a bar of Toblerone on your desk. That way, everyone will know your name is Toblerone
9
Get a government job.
8
If it looks, smells, feels, and tastes like dog poop, it's probably dog poop. Don't step in it.
8
Somebody was watching cheech and chong today
3
Nope. Just something based on a joke my dad told me.
3
Well your dad likes stoner movies and skits then
5
Save, save and save. Make sure you have an emergency fund that is at least your monthly salary x 6 months.
7
Along the same lines, put it somewhere where it will work for you (acceptable risk mutual funds etc.)
3
Difference between:
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they're, their, and there
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you're and your
You're welcome.
6
- Then, than and lose, loose.
1
Care for your teeth
6
Don't lick everything.
5
Apart from OP's mom
3
Sure about that?
2
If you're going to a party, take flowers, wine, or fancy soaps. Or call your mom, she'll tell you what to bring.
3
Step 1: don't be an idiot.
3
Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' And if they would, I do not do that thing.
2
Seriously, get shoes with velcros.
3
Don't spend more than you have.
3
Be nice and say little.
3
When someone explains something new or difficult to you, say it back to them in a way that you understand and ask if it is correct.
3
Step 2: When you have discovered the first step, you will know everything you need.
3
Don't be a dick.
2
Some mistakes are permanent.
2
Correctly placed apostrophes.
2
[deleted]
1
Do NOT put salt in your eye.
2
Also dont snort salt, grade school can be a bitch sometimes
2
The first step for getting yourself out of a hole is to quit digging.
Unless you operate a bulldozer for a living.
Good point - but it's advice for idiots. Hopefully there's not too many operating heavy machinery.
Have you ever worked construction?
Dig up, stupid
You've probably dug a lot, because that's deep
I've seen the bottom of a few holes.