Metal, Water, Blood

cold metal gun lies, and
cold metal bullet protects fire in heart,
cold metal and fire cause blood to flow like water,

blood-filled needle,
blood of needle
soaks
into the earth, and
the metal of the needle is
the self-inflicted metal bullet, and
the fire leaves the heart as
the watery tears of self-pity drown.

Feedback:

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/4j29w2/shenyi_tries_to_cross_the_sands/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/4j26v6/more_than_a_man/