Shackles

My emotions shackle me
in chains as cold as snow,
which hardly falls anymore,
at least not here in the city,
so we go north in the winter
to find frozen landscapes
just like we remembered;
to escape society and shiver
amongst the hushed pines,
so that we can better enjoy
steamy drawing rooms
in front of the hearth
 
They have no voice,
like stillborn spirits
they come to haunt me with
their indecipherable shrieks,
I force my head against the pillow
trying to push them out of my head,
they will not falter,
they will not flee
 
I am disconnecting the dots,
the frame is losing all shape,
like it was only in my mind,
like it was never in my head,
I have lost all faith in reality,
almost ready to drift away,
perchance to sleep, and dream,
to fall far down the rabbit hole,
willingly this time, at last
 
There is more hope
in a broken leper
than there is
left in me
 
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