Amazing. So poignant/honest/and full of self aware remorse at the same time. The spacing of the words for me helped to convey a sense of conscientiousness surrounding the loss but at the same time a deep regret which takes a while to process.

The set up of the poem seemed really apt to convey a lot of brief albeit strong feelings delivered by the writer.

I also got the image this poem as a rough apology scribbled briefly on a discarded letter or a used piece of paper which would then be discarded without reaching it's destination, presumably the mother.

Really like this. It tells quite a story in a couple of sentences. The short lines add a lovely start stop rhythm that makes the interaction seem beautifully uneasy.

Some people might dislike the minimalistic delivery of this piece, and how it lacks imagery and metaphor, but personally, I love it.  This piece has a tense build-up made grim by the frequent use of enjambment, as if the speaker himself is having trouble delivering this awful news.  I get very choked-up feeling from this piece.  The piece is given a lasting significance at the last three lines, when we learn that their son died, probably from taking the drugs that the speaker may have introduced him to.

This poem is very humble, somber, and laden with emotion.  It's experimental, but the experiment paid off.

I wanted it to be conversational.  For me, this is about the difficulty in trying to express how much other people actually mean(t) to you.  It's hard to get that kind of thing across.

I disagree.  The enjambment is well-used here to place emphasis where it is needed, and, as the author has said, provides a more conversational tone while still feeling significant and somber.  This doesn't seem like chopped-up prose to me.

Powerful, but I don't really find this very poetic. Spacing out a sentence or two does not a poem make.

This is great work. I love how minimalistic and blunt this poem is while still being very elegant and emotional.

Your poem has so much in it. I can picture the main character guilty and trying hard to fumble his way through an insufficient apology. You made me understand what the speaker is going through with so few words. And I really like how the words are spaced out, it really sounds like someone would say something that they find hard to say.

The only thing I don't like about it is that I'm sad now

Really brings a knot to my stomach. I've bonded with many people through drugs. I can't imagine wait it must feel like to lose one of them. Your delivery is very concise. I personally would've liked it a lot better if it was a rhyme.

I’m

Not sure

If 

You remember

Me;

I used 

To

Take drugs

With

Your son.

Anyway,

I’m sorry

For

Your loss.

[1](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/56uzb9/biota_bequeathed_flora_will_look_strange_on_phones/d8ncd5z) [2](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/56wtzi/ten_newku_done_w_the_form_for_a_bit_what_new_form/d8nc53v)


Funeral Dance