"Black frost will break the trees
before I'm done howling,
Lichen will cover the earth
before I stop snarling,
cobwebs will blot out the sky
before I pry open my mouth,
and swallow this bitter crow
you insist on serving."
Posted Jan 9, 2018, 10:11 PM UTC · edited
Very much spat out and saturated in it, this is a stand and I liked it a lot.
I don't see why other commenters have taken issue with the last two lines, even with out knowing the idiom, it seems a pretty straight forward connection: Crow, black, feathers; something you cannot swallow.
It would really take a lot of effort to swallow one of those damn birds too, they're quite smart as well, not likely to allow you to just pick them and eat them - unlike a blue footed booby.
"It would really take a lot of effort to swallow one of those damn birds too, they're quite smart as well, not likely to allow you to just pick them and eat them - unlike a blue footed booby."
This response made my day. So funny, and so true. A pack of crows is not called a "murder" for nothing. :)
Glad to be of service :)
interesting poem. I like the form: "that thing will happen / before this thing happens" repeated 3 times with the last repetition extending the "before" segment to 3 lines instead of one.
I am not sure what is meant by "swallow this bitter crow/you insist on serving". Is it a sexual inuendo, or something else we are not privy to?
In my opinion this needs to be clarified. If it is a sexual inuendo, then the poem can be summarized fairly easily and it loses its power by being too easily paraphrasable. If it is something that we don't know about, then its power remains cryptic and inaccessible. Why does the speaker feel this need to snarl and howl? What is the long suffering husband trying to do to her or get her to do? And why is he suffering?
The lines do convey a feeling, but it feels to me like the poem falls short of being fully fleshed out. I don't know. I don't need you to tell me the full story, nor do I want more lines or anything. Just something that's less cryptic than "bitter crow", something more open than that.
You can do without the quotes also. Since the entire poem is a monologue. The readers will get that it is one voice speaking.
I was playing with the idiom, 'to eat crow', aka admit a fault or failing. This poem could be read as extending the idea behind "it'll be a cold day in hell before I say I'm sorry"
wow. ok. well, I have never heard "to eat crow" as an idiom. where is it from? is it still in use there or when was it widespread?
It's an American idiom circa 1850, I can't speak to how popular it is but I know the British have the equivalent 'to eat humble pie'.
hahaha. ok i don't feel bad about not getting it then. i'm afraid you'll lose most of us 21st century readers with this one. but props for somehow knowing what idioms people used in the mid-1800s.
I like the buildup a lot, the imagery is a bit chilling and you use great vocabulary. Unfortunately, I also felt a bit let down by the finish. Not only did I not fully understand the metaphor, but it doesn't seem to fit with the imagery of the first 3/4--perhaps use a more visual metaphor?
As I said above, this poem is exploring the idiom 'to eat crow', aka admit fault. The woman is stubbornly refusing to eat crow (admit fault) served up to her by the long suffering man.
This is very descriptive. I like the way you use the concept of extremes to express your refusal to eat crow. I like the expression of "prying open your mouth", "cobwebs covering the earth", "lichen and black frost". These picturesquely portray the theme of determination and stubbornness you are going for. Very good and concise.
Reading the comments and understanding the meaning of "swallowing a crow" definitely changed my perspective of the poem. It is well-written and conveys the idea of stubbornness very well.
I really relate to this. It gives me an image of society trying to shove "what a women should be" down our throats. But we will not stop resisting. Thank you for sharing!
I think that, if the idiom "to eat crow" didn't exist, this poem would still stand well and communicate a strong feeling. The tone of crow is very inline with the rest of the poem and the image of eating a crow has enough connotation to convey how much the narrator doesn't want to do it.
I like the rhythm of this piece, the conceptual and sonic paterns line up nicely. I also really like the format of this. I would suggest exploring this title-quote form more because I think it has potential—idiom reanimation or not.
Thanks for the read, I really enjoyed this one :)
p.s the fact that the piece is addressed to a "long suffering man" may be contributing to (distracting?) sexual tones