Personally, from my experience and from my friends, I've never heard of playing hard to get work, not even once, why is this mentality still going? Or has it died down from your experience?
Posted Feb 6, 2018, 5:24 PM UTC
I think dudes still think women play hard to get because they don't want to accept that said women simply isn't interested in them.
But there are also a lot of places that tell women the last thing they should ever be is "easy" (otherwise known as having personal agency and going after what they want.)
Yeah that makes sense, this might be a thing that's ingrained in guys as well, the whole "She said no, but really she's just playing hard to get" mentality is super annoying, but I've seen my ladyfriends recommend playing hard to get to other girls, and it just baffles me, that might be justme though and very rare in the grand scheme of things.
I've actually never witnessed someone playing hard to get.
It isn't still going. Men just can't get it through their heads that "no" isn't an invitation to negotiate.
The only people I’ve heard talk about women playing hard to get are men who won’t take no for an answer.
It's not "playing hard to get"
It's called not being interested.
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I'm no longer in the dating scene, but from what I see around, I think it is decreasing overall.
There are still pockets where it's very popular (my conservative family members/friends often buy into the "make him work for you" mentality that goes along with playing hard to get), but I think in general, more people are buying into the idea that if you should say what you want and be more up front.
I think because people are insecure and they want to make sure someone's really into them so they don't risk rejection. Or they've internalized our culture to mean that women can't seem "easy."
If you think it's happening, there's 2 potential scenarios going on:
She's a crafty & manipulative lady who is aware of this game & has identified some benefit in getting you to pursue her.
She's seriously not interested & you are misinterpreting it.
It's never happened to me, I'm not much of a chaser at all so if they say they're not interested/hint at that I just stop. I've just seen this kind of happen to other people and was unsure about it, that's why I asked.
It's not playing..
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They're not "playing hard to get". They're just not interested but men refuse to accept that.
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Taking things slow is also mistaken as playing hard to get. Like for me every time I was interested in a guy, they wanted to take it way faster than I do. They were interested enough to want to get too flirty too soon or get physical too soon. For me it takes getting to know the person. I might be interested in someone enough to want to get to know them but not yet interested in getting physical or too flirty. If they ignore different people have different speeds, they might think I'm "playing" hard to get.
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I haven't seen it with my friends or acquaintances.
I've never known anyone who was actually "playing hard to get". In most cases where someone was accused of it, the simple answer was that they just weren't interested and the pursuer wouldn't accept that.
I can see that, I've seen my share of delusional guys who think there's still a chance even when the girl denied their advances.