[2nd Poem On Here] 2002 White Subaru Outback

Suicide is difficult

on family members, but I keep seeing 2002 White Subaru Outbacks

like the one I bought you 10 months ago after

we moved to the west to grow together.

You left

the title at our home when you drove off

to love someone else.

I keep seeing 2002 White Subaru Outbacks, parked askew

like the night we were lost

and I held on to you-

r promise that you wouldn't ever leave me.

shaking aluminum frames, your mother's doubt in us,

in windswept Idaho parking lots.

I try my best to forget

about 2002 White Subaru Outbacks.

To move

on, to lay eyes on a sunrise after the kind of cold night that makes you wonder whether the sun has been permanently snuffed from the sky.

I'm dying

to never see a 2002 White Subaru Outback again.

But I'm not in the driver's seat.

And my car is crashing.

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