Feeling guilty for making my mom cry.
I yelled at my parents today after I had just gotten home from a graveyard shift where I had been thinking of all the things I missed out on because of my parents hoarding and neglect. I realized that since my room was used to store other family members stuff I never had room to explore hobbies of my own. I yelled at them because they bought one of my brothers a house with the agreement that he pay them back but it been a decade and I don't believe he's made any payments on it. They've fixed up that house while letting the house we live decay; about a decade ago the the tiles fell off the shower wall and my dad just put up some hard plastic as a quick fix so now we have a cockroach nest in the wall. I finally told them that i hate them because they ruined my life and I can't forgive them because even if I could turn my life around I'll never get back my teen's or early 20's. i tried talking to her later in the day and while crying she told me that everything I said was true and that she had ruined my life. It a catch 22 where I can't take the guilt from hurting her, can't keep living in this house unless something changes, and I can't afford to move out.
Posted Feb 28, 2022, 2:13 AM UTC
If she's the type to guilt trip (i.e., make you feel bad and try to trick you into apologizing and taking all the blame), ignore her.
If she had an epiphany and is genuinely showing remorse, tell her you'd love to sit down and figure out a way together to make it better. Like things they could fix around the house, moving or getting rid of the things in your room, etc.