Source
r/OCPoetry•
lemrind

Invisible Being

Poem

Im not untouchable Im not a ghost Im not a creature Im simply an invisible person

A brisk tap you feel on your shoulder You disregard as the wind I am not the wind I am human I convince myself As the crowd avoids me As my name runs forgotten I am human I convince myself

But im so shapeless I have no rough corners I have no rounded edges I don’t have a voice I don’t have ears or a nose Nor do I have a face Only eyes to perceive the world around me

But are these lonely eyes enough? I try to muster strength I construct a new voice I make new ears I create a new nose I build a new face And I start to mutter words That are still not enough

No matter how hard I wave my arms No matter how hard I shout I’m just a nobody Nowhere to go and nowhere to stay My mind too, is a nomad In a jungle of thoughts Clear and translucent thoughts Just like I am

I am not human I convince myself You cant touch me You cant see me I am not human I convince myself I have no more thoughts My mind is just a barren white land I have no more face Everything I have ever built is for naught For I am just a being An invisible being

I copy and pasted this from notes so I apologize for the format :,) https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/urcmpc/ad_sorry_this_poem_is_a_little_unorthodox/i8yqxgp/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/uro3z1/the_song_that_tumbles/i8ypavs/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3

Posted May 17, 2022, 4:47 PM UTC · edited

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1
Tr33Hugg3r-206•

Dreadful, impossible loneliness and a forlorn sense if impotence. No shape, no way to influence anyone or thing, nothing possible except observation. Not even human...but it takes convincing. The subject IS human, but doesn't believe it. A sense of rage and impotence, but not due to lack of effort, not because the subject cant be those things, but because they aren't being recognized, acknowledged as already being those things....human, effective, heard, seen. It strikes me that the subject may have thought of giving up on trying anymore, but, instead, decided to use it as armor, to accept it as a byproduct of being human. Very interesting, very Harlan Ellison-esque. (or I could be way off :) )Well done!

1
Mocma10x•

Wonderful blend of the lyrical and narrative. Perhaps it’s just the limitation of Reddit’s format, but the line breaks seem to be a bit inconsistent. It seems that this would be a poem that would benefit greatly from playing around with layout and presentation, maybe change the line length to a few different styles, make it into something unique on the page. Other than that, excellent work.

1