It's about desires that can't possibly be fulfilled no matter what but are still powerful enough to have a constant hold over you.

Life is obviously the most preferable. But to actually live would mean to satisfy those desires which remember, cannot be satisfied.
So death is a close alternative. In death you're not happy but you're not sad.
If you can't be happy, then oblivion is the next best thing.

This 'never ending present' is both literal and metaphorical. The present is filled with pain from the realization that your life can never actually be 'yours'.
Every moment you dwell in the knowledge that your actions are futile because that gaping hole in your heart can never be closed because you don't even know what it is/don't have the means to close it 

This poem poses death as the solution. It's nothing but infinite in it's nothingness.

The last line ties it to the title. It poses death as a sort of mercy for those who can't bear this world.


I hope I was able to properly expla

Interesting poem. You talk about absence of want as death. It is almost as though without desire, you aren't human. Ironically, as per Buddhism, absence of want is happiness :). In fact, many philosophers say that happiness stems from being in the present. However, your poem talks about "never ending present" as some sort of a curse.

I was unable to fully understand what the poem is trying to say. But, I like the writing style of the poem - especially the lines with the contradictions : "I'd rather not be than be without".


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

I like the message. It’s interesting and it’s something I’ve considered myself before. But my unsolicited take on this is that awareness in full, that is to say pure awareness, accomplishes what the lack of awareness/being seems to accomplish and does it while remaining “alive”. Mere awareness is acceptance. You don’t need a lack of anything at all in order to be truly free. Although, I must admit, the absence of anything is a sort of solution to the problem as well. That’s what makes it alluring. It’s just not the *best* solution.

The definition of a meta poem will vary. It's not necessarily a poem about poetry. I think that's something else. 
I literally mean a poem that delves into metaphysical topics like death, time, reality, deep philosophy. It's extraordinarily difficult to communicate aspects of these unconventional topics to those not familiar with it's profound nuances.

Thanks alot!
I re read this and saw that your advice made sense and I implemented it to the best of my ability (I'm open to more suggestions)

But what exactly is a meta poem?
I understand it to be poetry about poetry but I don't understand how it applies here

These meta poems are hard to convey, aren't they?

I think I was able to grasp the messages it seems you wanted to get across. Which makes the poem successful, right.

Death is a feared solace, and the only alternative to it is this madness we call life. I get from here a feeling of an no desire to live out of boredom (btw, the I'm sure many will have to stop halfway or after the first read to define ennui. I thought I had a large vocab but I've never seen that before lol)

But, the main thing was the question marks on the 2nd and 3rd lines of the poem. Believe it or not, the entire first stanza is really only one question; it only needs one question mark at the end. I super suggest combining the elaboration of the first line by combining the wants into one sentence by separating each one with versatile m dashes or commas, and then one question mark after "unhinged." Punctuation has a huge impact on the way poetry is read, especially considering it's one of the few tools we have in our

Damn that was beautiful. I actually was just conceiving of a meta poem as well.  
Life really can feel so futile. Animals go to and fro and don't wonder or care beyond surviving to the next day.  
Humans were cursed with knowledge and understanding. And it's impossible to pretend and escape the feeling of awareness

Just leave two spaces after each line and voila!

this isn't poem related, but how do you edit your poem so the lines stack on top each other without space?

What is death but the absence of want?  
the want of a love you've never known?  
the want for a time you don't belong in?  
the want of a hearth in your chest,   
enveloping you,   
until what is left,  
is total satisfaction,  
unhinged.   

I'd rather not be than be without.  
Without the means to fill this all consuming hole,  
ever unsatisfied,  
without a past nor a future,   
trapped in a never ending present.  

I'd rather lack awareness than be aware of what I can't be.   
The curse of sentience blights us all.  
In futility we see it as a gift  
because we dread the alternative.  
But absolute lack is freeing in it's nothingness,  
in it's infinity.   
The lack of joy but also sorrow.  
The lack of respite but also censure.   


Drifting in ennui,  
I suddenly realize,  
I'd rather not live than live a life that isn't mine.   

[Num1] (https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tlvprf/the_life_of_a_high_school_student/i1xmaea/)

[Num2] (https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tm28jn/not_mine/i1xltb5/)

Quietus