I finally used some of the techniques my therapist suggested, and holy shit, they work.
Not reacting right away, writing down both my side and theirs, telling the person who made me mad why they made me mad, then thanking them for listening to me.
I don't know if things are 100% back to normal, but I didn't burn a million bridges get to feel a rush of the attack. It's nice.
Posted Jul 26, 2022, 8:56 AM UTC
737
Nice. How do you not react right away, in the moment?
Edit: I'm new here and just took a look at the FAQ in the sidebar: it's question #1 there... https://www.reddit.com/r/anger/wiki/faq
For me sometimes it’s about the breath I take to yell. I’ve gotten in a habit of holding that breath and it brings me back juuuuust enough to realize I’m in rage mode. It’s all about forming new habits and being able to recognize you are angry.
Just don't? It sounds trite but if you're mad you don't have to yell at someone or let it take control. You may still feel mad but you don't have to destroy a relationship or your job by screaming your head off.
Wow that’s so helpful, just don’t do it. Therapy really does work!
Hah hah. Not giving in is just part of it. It has be redirected in a productive manner.
You don't give in immediately to hunger, do you? It's possible to wait and endure it, even if it's uncomfortable or unpleasant.
Amazing insight