Is my profile clear enough? I don't want anyone to feel like I'm catfishing them.
Posted Aug 15, 2022, 7:06 PM UTC · locked
2.8K240
I would just say to get rid of the "so swipe left if that's a deal breaker." That's a given, if people aren't interested then that's what they will do.
1.7K
That's a fair point, I'll definitely tweak that
531
Nah, don't. Keep it. You're setting a firm boundary there, and those are always helpful.
233
I disagree. I think it sets a negative tone right off the bat and I make sure to swipe left on anyone with anything like that. It's completely unneccesary and redundant to say it. There are better ways to set boundaries.
243
n = 1
-16â€
It also hopefully adds an extra no bullshit warning for the trolls that may harass her.
56
Is there any specific reason why you added that part?
14
Probably gets a lot of right swipes out of curiosity or other reasons otherwise
96
As long as they're not being harassed.
4â€
I think you could keep it! Why not stick it to them haha.
-29
How is that sticking it to anyone? Not like those people are doing anything wrong lol..
18
In my head, I was saying, “it is what it is and I’m ok with that.” But clearly I didn’t communicate that well. Stick it to them sounds like a fuck you— I should have clocked that
6â€
because theres no need to its not discrimination to date the opposite sex
0â€
Woah I wanna clarify that I just thought it wasn’t aggressive to say swipe left if you aren’t ok with this
2
Honestly curious. Do you (anyone can answer) feel you date specific genders or sexes? Because I'm not sure the answer is so clear for everyone...
1â€
My strategy is to put a bunch of red flags then "Swipe right if that's a deal breaker", gets a lot of matches from people who are good at following instructions.
45
[removed]
15
[removed]
0
Why you copy and paste someone else’s comment as your own lol
1
Nah it's clear enough, I couldnt date anyone that listen to Within Temptation, glad you mentioned it 🤨
844
Lmao fair enough
191
Maybe take the non-monogamy up into the first paragraph, just so people see it without clicking the profile.
But totally clear otherwise and I'd swipe right.
401
To be honest... stating your are trans kills off 99% of any thought you could be a catfish. If people don't notice it's because they were too lazy to bother reading. Everything is fine, you are up front and honest. If someone thinks you are catfishing they are too dumb to be in the same building as and you dodged a bullet
230
But a lot of dudes just look at the pictures and don’t read the profiles. I’ve had friends that are trans and put it in the first paragraph of their tinder bios and their dates would still be surprised 🙄.
64
What if she's cis, but catfishing guys after a transwoman?
How would they know?
-112
Zero sane ciswomen would put their safety and wellbeing at stake the way trans people do just by existing in a transphobic world just to catfish people with a trans fetish.
105
Zero sane ciswomen
Well yeah, but we're talking about actual women who exist, not the mythical creatures you are talking about.
-105
You've picked a very strange strawman here.
74
Transphobes be like "noooo I don't wanna let this person exist as themselves even though it literally doesn't affect me at all!!!1!1!!!1111"
28
[deleted]
46
I feel like the "married but open" bit is also something that some segment would find disqualifying and would suggest moving it up. But I don't know if people would feel "catfished" by that necessarily. Just might come as a surprise otherwise.
It also gives you an easy reference point on a match. "Just making sure you saw the first paragraph of my profile and none of that is an issue for you?"
173
[deleted]
13
The fuck is wrong with you for saying such things? The only one making anyone have a terrible time is you, right here and now.
-11
[deleted]
7
You literally wrote "being a trans woman she is gonna have a terrible time"... Glad it wasn't your intention, but there's not much left to interpret and I think sentences like these can do serious harm to people who are in a comparable situation.
-6â€
Totally clear. And while maybe overkill and probably unfair, you may want to mention it again in chat before you meet up. Just to avoid any illiterate assholes.
143
Some people just don't read bios too.
21
Clear enough for sure. I don't mean to cross a border here, but: I might have still swiped right instantly without reading any further. Beautiful woman in front of a drum set? What else do I need to know?
75
Did you touch my drum set?!?
52
Like John Bonham playing Moby Dick.
5
Yes, it's reasonable to expect that some dudes are going to swipe right because attractive drum lady and then when matching they'll read the profile to find something to open with and they'll either a) roll with it b) immediately unmatch or c) be dicks about it. Nothing for it I suspect.
After all, not everybody likes vegans.
20
The drum set has a dick
-44
Post op, no dong.
17
Look i know that you're a bigot but reread the profile one more time to see what you missed.
7
[removed]
-28
Swipe w/o reading is ok but you got to read to chat
71
Someone said to mention in chat for people who dont read bios, seems like overkill but def a good idea. Youre cute as hell and I can def see people swiping on you without reading the bio
54
Or drop in clues with a side note. It's awkward to ask "have you read my bio?"
I not trans but in an open relationship and usually do something like this when I just tell a story:
"Oh, you've been to Athens last week? I always wanted to see Greece. Maybe next year. My partner and I (you've probably already read that in my bio, but just to go sure because I really dont want to blindside anyone) went to Italy this summer, tho."
29
I know it's an important part of being in an open relationship, but when you start a conversation with "me and my partner" it's sound like "you are not as much important as my partner" or something like that. But I know it's because you need to specify it for people who don't read
11
Ah, sorry. No, I think we misunderstood each other there.
That's definitely not how I start the conversation. Just at some point where it fits early on during the conversation. "Did you go anywhere this summer?" - "Oh, me and my partner went to Italy last month and next month I'll be going to London on my own."
That kinda stuff. I usually don't even mention them afterwards except explicitly asked to or when I'm telling some anecdote. They are dating me, my SO is basically a indirect acquaintance or a stranger to them.
(Clarified it in my initial post, too, thanks!)
8
I feel bad for you because most will swipe and not read, and you are doing a great job. Best thing is to ignore the mass swipers
41
Couldn’t be much clearer. Also you’re absolutely stunning
30
Perfectly clear.
The type of pictures I hate are the ones that looks like they were taken with old-school polaroid cam, then it was scanned twice for good measure.
29
As someone who is polyamorous, I'd probably like to know what your intentions are. Are you looking for a partner, fwb, ons?
I'd likely only swipe right on partner and possibly fwbs.
27
Oh good call, I can edit it to more explicitly say looking for partners and friends, I'm a bit intimidated by ons lol. Thanks!
18
Tbf the deal breaker for me is that you're married.
22
I just woke up from a 20 year long coma. What the honest fuck is a Pansexual trans woman ?
20â€
Pansexual means all sexes. Men, Women, Non-Binary folks. Trans Women means a person who was born Male but has transitioned to a woman. Post Op means they had surgery to reflect who they are actually are. Hope that helps!
12
All genders* but yep pretty much it
9
Derp, you’re totally right. But yes, all genders.
9
You woke up from a 20 years long coma but know about reddit and tinder?
9â€
Also, lead with married…whether pan or poly if that’s how you classify your relationship, because you’re in one, say it up front.
17
I hope this question doesn't offend you but I am curious what post op trans means? I know what trans is just never seen that before.
15
I've had bottom surgery, I wanted to be clear up front that I don't have a penis.
22
Ok thank you! Thank you for educating me :)
16
Seems very clear to me! Very beautiful picture btw :)
14
Are married people on this app getting more fucking swipes than me??
12
Likely
8
[deleted]
1
I'd put the married thing in the first paragraph as well.
I'll update that, that makes sense. Thanks!
gif
Teflon or ceramic pans?
Cast iron 🥵
Ah, so sausages preferred
​
gif
Hope you have put the marriage thing in the paragraph as you're advised to prevent people from having the feelings that you're catfishing them.
Yeah, I changed the bio to
Very clear. I’d swipe right!
[deleted]
[removed]
Who would downvote that? She is beautiful.
Down tremendous
Yup, that's the only change I'd make. Looks like a good profile to me
[removed]