Calactic

This video is the original

I need help finding a parody of this involving ketamine, the only things I remember are:

That the letter 'F' was something like 'Face - is her face fucked up'

'T' - Time to call her dealer.

and the final line was similar to: 'Ketamine, don't let granny have all the fun'

I've searched for all the above and get nowhere. The video is over 6 years old at least.

I think the voice was kind of similar to the one used in pendulum songs, i.e. blood sugar.

http://www.radiotimes.com/news/2017-10-24/after-that-stage-fall-gemma-collins-is-considering-suing-the-bbc/

We all know how the bbc are health and safety mad, so I don't think she has a leg (a stage?) to stand on, it just annoys me that her outstanding incompetence might lead her to not only getting a fat pay day, but also being in the public eye more.

So when I grab the green packet of said crisps under the assumption that it's pickled onion, I get back to work to find out not only have I actually picked up Cheese and Onion, that Golden Wonder has discontinued Pickled Onion as a flavour altogether and replaced it with Cheese.

I have of course written to Golden Wonder and requested that the marketing guru who scrapped Pickled Onion for Cheese be fired, preferably into the Sun.

Psyched myself up as I was filling it up to £10 and made sure to give the owner a piece of my mind after begrudgingly paying £1.34 a litre.

Then I remembered my missus wanted a red bull so it was super awkward going back to the till.

(I also pulled up at the pump with my fuel cap on the wrong side after making a joke with the missus about the last time that happened)