Exceliber

Hey guys! Here’s something I’ve been struggling with in multiple realms of my life: what are ways to get over feeling the need for external validation?

Don’t get me wrong- I think it can be a powerful thing, but I fear I’ve become too attached to it. First it started with feeling good about my body, and showing it off. Now it’s creeping into my quarantining project of making art. I’ve been posting it online and elated when I get good feedback- but I struggle even more because if I post a booty pic it gets lots of attention. Then I post a piece of art I’m proud of, that took years of working on skill and hours to create, and it gets maybe half the response.

So, in a step towards mindfulness

So I’ll start with the back story- my best bro and I met probably seven or eight years ago and quickly became super close. We were FWB, but he and I both admitted we were in love with each other but both married (both of our partners knew as well) and didn’t want to push our relationship to more than it was.

I moved out of town four years ago for my husband’s job, and we both promised things wouldn’t change and it really looked like it wouldn’t. We texted multiple times every day, and visited whenever we could. But things did change- at least on his hand.

I moved back to Chicago last spring, I kept trying to hang out with him, but kept getting told he was too busy. At first I just accepted