HighbrowCrap

I struggle with standing out from the crowd

except tonight since everybody left

no one to judge me harshly or at all

so here goes nothing special to lose

​

What do you get when you cross poor social

control with bottomless entertainment?

A fat narcissist starving for attention

At least the mic’s static gives me feedback

​

Why did the lonely man cross the road?

So at least car drivers notice him

Oooh that joke hits the spot where it hurts

Sad jokes and savage irony kill me

​

Knock knock

Knock knock is anybody home

Knock knock please somebody answer me

knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock

​

If a tree falls in a forest a

A script for a comedy skit monologue to be performed on stage. Try to imagine an actor delivering these lines. The last line is delivered by a separate narrator.

link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1flcX6H3BdnGOGSxuVQ4sdAPXpz021Sj2EiOAvGyK-VE/edit?usp=sharing

I welcome any feedback but am particularly interested in the following:

1. Which lines did you find funny or unfunny? You need not recommend how to make it funnier if nothing comes to mind - a simple I did/didn't laugh is fine on its own. It should get funnier as it goes on.
2. Did the character voice seem consistent and believab

Dear God I question your design
why the world’s surface is mostly
water dangerous to ingest
while life sustaining freshwater
must be sought before running dry

I humbly suggest a quick fix
turn oceans to fresh oases
to quench thirst for war over seas

For inland reach I recommend
vast criss-crossing routes of rivers
to optimally propagate
crisp clear water conveniently

Lastly a remedy for droughts
consistent overnight clean rain
would gift us water without work
and predictably juicy crops
satiating some starvation

In response to this wise request
God graciously grants us a flood
for forty days and forty nights

============================

Thanks for reading!

This poem has been revised. Read the newer version: https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/uk36m6/empty_open_mic_v5/

================

I nervously walk the hot spotlit stageI look out to see who I need to pleaseThe door shuts as the last patron leavesThe butterflies in my stomach turn to stoneon the stage of an empty open mic

My trembling hands gingerly grab the micmy only conduit for self expressionI resolve the show must boldly go onmaking light of the dark space telling jokeson the stage of an empty open mic

What do you get when you cross poor socialcontrol with bottomless entertainment?A fat narcissist star

EDIT: I am no longer accepting feedback on this piece as it has now been performed. You can find the performed version (15 seconds) here if you're interested: https://www.reddit.com/r/HighbrowCrap/comments/u9qub6/motivational_murderer/

A script for a comedy skit monologue to be recorded in front of a camera. Stage directions are italicized in parentheses. Try to imagine an actor delivering these lines.

I welcome any feedback but am particularly interested in the following:

1. Which lines did you find funny or unfunny? Every paragraph is supposed to get a laugh. You need not recommend how to make it funnier if