[3378] Chapter 1 - The Boy Not Heard

Hello! This is the first chapter of a dual POV YA Science Fantasy that I've been working on. I'd appreciate any and all crits! Given that this is YA, thoughts on the characters (and also prose) would especially be appreciated.

View: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aiafszB5-1g3X5BOMFe-888oO_r4t9tKOWTd6g_Ue44/edit?usp=sharing

Comments: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1F-dHLyVIRAlSdQ63laAzjKgxqcFo8yDp3_WSGhkNR2k/edit?usp=sharing

Crits:

1420 leftover: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/149xgvl/1970_sophia_and_the_colour_weavers_middlegrade/jomarzt/?context=3

789: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/14s4d6h/789_do_not_read/jqwkyr2/?context=3

1372: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/14qctd8/1372_draugma_skeu_ch3/jqxsmre/?context=3

3514: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/14tlv75/3514_red_one_ch_one/jr5zbt6/?context=3

total words used: 7095

*I'd posted half of this yesterday but took it down before anyone critted so I could crit a bit more and hopefully get the whole chapter in. Please let me know if more crits are needed for the submission!