Tsunami

This gives me the feeling of an overwhelming love. The kind that makes you forget yourself. You would give everything for this love, but it is still unhealthy or unwanted. You fight for your independence but that love will always hold you down somehow. I like how it shows both the positive and negative feelings love can bring about. How hard it can be to let yourself open up if you have been hurt. How out of control and helpless falling in love can feel. Very accurate to me.

This a great poem that reminds that love that makes you forget everything else is bad for you. It makes you forget others, and even yourself. When that person leaves you, you are left to wonder what is happening, just like when the water from a tsunami recedes before the wave. Then the wave hits and you are filled emotions of love for that person and it drowns you. In the end when faced the signs of unhealthy love or anything that is harmful you must run and head for higher ground, just like in the case of a Tsunami.

A very nice poem! I feel the pain and melancholy in your poem. Very beautiful, keep writing!

Amazing use of words! I really feel the intense emotion of love throughout the poem. The very last line, regarding drowning, is so powerful. I’ve had experiences with my current S/O where this line really struck a chord (music pun DEFINITELY intended). Beautiful! :)

This is not just about love but loving someone so much you almost mold to their will. It's chilling the description you use and I love that it's so sensual!

I can’t believe someone put into words how i feel about someone else wow.

The feeling of being swept away is present throughout this poem. There's a scale and weight to the feeling contained, and the idea of it eclipsing everything else is very well conveyed. The sense of comfortable surrender is also very clear, that the point of view knows they're making a mistake, but doesn't care at this point.

Completely relatable as most do when they fall in love. They want it to work out so bad they'll let the wave just take them away forgetting who they were. Just so they can be something someone wanted when in the end someone changes their mind and they're left alone to drift down to the bottom.

Nicely done!

You've done something here that I rarely feel from a poem. The flow of your words, from line to line, genuinely reads like a tsunami.

Not only that the length of the lines and paragraphs start small, grow longer and longer and then recede back to a short finish like a tsunami might, but also in your use of punctuation and sentence structure. Some lines feel fast-flowing, long and rapid, while others break up into lists with a staccato feel. Reading it feels like being caught up and lost in the turmoil of the onrushing ocean and then with the last line, surrendering to it.

If you were going for that, then I'd say you've genuinely hit this one out of the park.

It feels like a scene from a mural about the Greek gods. I think a couple of your rhyme choices could be more unique, such as the line ‘pulls me in with its melody’. I’m not convinced that this is the most interesting way to do this. The rhythm in this line is also a little bit jarring.

It’s great though - thanks for sharing!

I really like the imagery you decided to go with it definitely shows alot of creativity on your part and shows alot of insight in how you view the world

Love this piece! The imagery used is very romantic. I especially liked the idea of "burning water" near the end... an excellent idea!

You are very descriptive and it just makes readers imagine what this person is going through.

Masterfully done!

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