UPDATE: I went about starting a relationship with a friend, and here's how it turned out
Posted Mar 26, 2009, 7:38 PM UTC
290258
There's something so cute about the solidarity of Redditors. Why does it feel as if your victory is sort of my victory too?
Good job, dude.
84
Because there is a common emotion that binds all Redditors together - that emotion being giggity.
37
The result being goo.
17
I usually don't goo until after the second giggity.
3
...literally
fap fap fap
2
I sent her a text message "hey do you have some time to talk?" to open things up, and to be sure she wasn't busy or in public. She said yes, so I waited a minute to compose myself properly and then gave her a call.
FTFY
27
Yeah. I read the original lines 5 times to make sure I didn't miss anything. I concluded he was an ass for calling when she was busy.
16
Think he's still high from the adrenaline rush.
21
Would not equate seeing a movie next Saturday with lusting for your genitals.
Good making the first move, but I'd hold out on high-fives until you guys are actually kissing and the such.
26
Agreed. Until the first kiss, I'd still say that this is up in the air. Not to rain on the parade (and hey, good job so far!), but it is possible to fuck shit up at this point in a budding relationship. I should know.
4
"So yeah, I failed on just about every possible level."
No mace.
No restraining order.
No arrest for attempted rape.
Sounds like a win to me...
22
I love reddit's rock bottom level.
38
speaking of which, how'd that party of yours go?
10
You haven't seen the pictures of the lemoun party?
4
Do not click this. It is not work safe, and is a picture of senior citizen men having gay sex.
-1
He should be happy he has running water.
2
Any date you walk away from is a good one.
3
I suddenly feel much better about my life.
2
Nicely done. But for the love of God don't tell her that you told everyone on reddit about it.
21
...until you're together for a long time. I think it would be a sweet story to tell the grandkids, if you ask me (a girl).
4
You give hope to all the friend-zoned redditors
<3
13
She said yes, and I'm glad you weren't slick. I don't like people who talk to me like I'm a mannequin. Congratulations!
7
densha otoko
6
herumesu!
3
Remember this. The friends who give you the advice on getting together also get to hear the...you know...details.
6
Fuck yeah man! Way to have the balls to do something like this. She probably digs the shit out of you and your gonna have to buy 20 boxes of condems before the weekend is over.
4
Are these 'Condems' the condemning type of condoms?
3
Seems like awesome news from a guy with a user name very similar to a Pokemon.
3
scroll... He does.
edit: Mac scroll acceleration, I can get from here to the top in one scroll in case you were wondering.
1
[deleted]
3
Good for you buddy! Word of advice from here on out: As much as we like hearing your progress, don't keep updating Reddit about your relationship with her... at least not while you're actively in a relationship with her and without her knowledge of it. If she finds it (or some jackass internet detectives you and sends her the links) it won't be easy to recover from.
3
Congratulations! I wish you two the best.
2
I WISH YOU THE BEST TOO!!! SORRY THAT I'M SHOUTING, BUT THE SONG YOU'RE PLAYING IS TOO LOUD AND I CAN BARELY MAKE YOU OUT!!! CAN YOU TURN IT DOWN PLEASE?!
1
Faggot. Go attend a stranger's wedding.
-8
I totally understand where you are coming from here and I think that all the self-proclaimed debonaire dickheads who are confused as to why he couldn't handle it as cooly as you would have, shut up and think about it for a bit.
After becoming so comfortable with everything you say to a friend of the opposite sex nothing prepares you for the conversation electabuzz had to go through. It is a completely different type of conversation you are having and it can very easily be botched, regardless of how confident and how socially knowledgeable you are.
Props buddy.
2
I can sort of relate.
I've got a friend who's a really talented debater.
Also, there's this girl whom I've really liked since we met a few years ago. We became friends quickly, but I knew less then about how to deal with members of the opposite sex beyond friendly banter than I do now, and while I've improved since then, it's not by much. Worse yet, shortly after she and I became friends, she met some other dude, and they started dating, and that relationship lasted up until just a few months ago, so there was that insurmountable obstacle for a long time.
So back to the present, she dumps the other dude, and a number of my friends, who know I've liked her, are getting on my case that I should tell her how I feel. The temptation to wuss out and not do anything in favor of the status quo is pretty strong, but I decide I do need to take action before it's too late (again). I contact her and set up a date. The first half of our date is ho-hum, but the second half picks up considerably, so much so that I would use the word "rad" to describe it. After all the fun, during our drive back, I tell her what's what.
Now you may ask why did I wait to tell her until the end of the date. I did it that way so that if it turned out awkward, we had still had a fun day instead of tainting the day straight from the start. Anyway, despite saying some things that I immediately wished I hadn't due to diarrhea of the mouth brought on by nervous tension, all seemed to go well, and she seemed to take it well. I had her laughing at some points due to my delivery.
But now I'm in a weird spot. She wasn't sure about being "more than friends" right now because she's transferring to another school soon (not that far away at all, really, but still an understandable reason), but didn't go out of her way to make it clear that it would never happen. Since that date, we've hung out and had fun, and we're probably going to hang out in a week or two. I get the feeling it's probably not going to work because she's going to be busy with university in another city, and I'll still be in community college with a while to go before I'll be ready to transfer. Despite what I feel are slim chances, I don't think all hope is lost, and until then I'll hold out for the possibility that something may happen because she's fantastic.
2
Master debater?
2
Good luck with that!
Now with the caveat that I have absolutely no business giving romantic advice, you could try suggesting that there's no reason you two can't enjoy each other's company in the time you have before she transfers, then see where you are once that day comes.
1
God you put way too much thought and effort into that. Don't do that to your actual date, be yourself and have fun or else we're gonna read a wall o text about an awkward first date and subsequent avoidance of phone calls from you.
2
I bet she could tell you were nervous and was just as flattered by that as she would have been by your sweet talk.
Good for you!
1
Now you need to make a post to gonewild.
Feel free to use the same headline.
1
OK reddit, here's my field log. If you don't know what this post is about, refer here: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/87e37/how_do_i_go_about_starting_a_romantic/
I made my call at 1:34pm CST today (17 minutes ago as of right now... much more once I'm done writing this post), and it lasted 11 minutes.
I spent quite literally all morning planning out what I was going to say, almost word for word. I even did a quick recitation in front of a mirror just to make sure I had it down pat. It was fucking good. My inflection was great, it was romantic without being creepy, everything was great. I was a competitive debater back in high school, so I know this stuff pretty well.
I sent her a text message "hey do you have some time to talk?" to open things up, and to be sure she wasn't busy or in public. She said yes (fixed that for me), so I waited a minute to compose myself properly and then gave her a call. It's important to make note here that this isn't the first time I've asked a girl out, and usually I'm slick as hell about these things. But as I said in my previous topic, the girls I asked out were almost invariably strangers whom I had no personal stake in, whereas this girl is a good friend of mine.
I started off good enough, true to my rehearsal. But things went downhill and very fast. It wasn't that I forgot the words (former debater here, remember. I can memorize a thousand word speech no problem, and even if that fails I can ad lib my way out of just about anything), but rather the tone of my voice was all wrong and I was talking too fast and hesitated too much. If I was giving a speech on something mundane like gun regulations, I would have been able to realize these mistakes and fix them on the fly. But here, fuck, I was terrible, and I couldn't do anything about it. If I was a public-speaking teacher, I would give my performance a D+. Some points for a good script, but a completely botched execution. Think "Hamlet being performed by non-native English speaking teens with down syndrome" level of botched.
I had all of these clever things to say that would have made the heart of any woman melt like butter upon hearing them, but when the time came I just skipped over them. Probably a good thing, too. Juliet would have ditched Romeo's faggy ass if he couldn't control the tone of his voice and spoke fast during his romantic lines. It's all about inflection.
The worst part of all, though, was not the explaining to her that I had feelings for her but rather actually asking her out on a date. I knew that to be effective, I would have to sound confident, direct, concise, and specific. Something along the lines of "Do you want to see a movie with me on Saturday?" would have been stellar. I took the alternate approach of "Hey, um, so now that I said all that stuff, well you know, that I like you and stuff, I was... here, let me start over. Do you think that, uh, maybe sometime you want to go out and do something sometime, like this weekend maybe? Only if you want to, of course." Except in reality, I was probably much worse.
So yeah, I failed on just about every possible level. I really wish I had done the asking in person, I probably would have still screwed it up, but at least she would have seen my face to know that some genuine emotion was going along with what I was saying. No, I wasn't a ferocious man-raptor. No I didn't record the call (I would have if I knew a way to record cell calls) but even if I did I wouldn't share it online because it embarrassing. In fact, I think I'll block this memory from my mind in some vain attempt to retain my manhood and if she ever brings it up I'll deny recollection. But I was genuine. And she said yes! She's leaving the state tonight to visit some relatives (she told me about this on Tuesday and I had forgotten, so I know it's not just a dodge) and won't get back until Monday, so we have no definite plans as of yet. To be honest I was so frazzled by the end of the call that making any sort of plans would have been completely above my mental capacity and I would have been prone to breaking down and sobbing. So instead, I just told her I'd call her sometime this weekend to make plans.
That about wraps it up! Sorry for the long post - I made it just as much for myself as for you guys. Thanks for the advice in the previous post, even if I managed to completely fail at utilizing it. And hopefully I can stand as some beacon of hope for all other friendzoned guys out there who are in a situation similar to mine. Chau.
Edit: HOLY SHIT WALL OF TEXT. tl;dr: Turns out she totally digs me and lusts for my genitals after all.
First I was like:
o_0 Wall of text
Then I was like:
:/ poor guy
Then I was like:
:D Nice man!
First I was like:
o_0 Wall of text
Then I was like:
:/ scrolling down
Then I was like:
:D Great, there's a tl;dr version!
First I was like:
o_0 Small o, underscore and a zero
Then I was like:
:/ Colon and a slash
Then I was like:
:D Colon and a capital d!
I gave your mom's colon a capital d.
8======D
PENIS HAR HAR HAR!!!11one
First I was like:
o_0 GIGGITY
Then I was like:
:/ aww giggity
Then I was like:
:D giggity giggity goo
AWWRIGHT
OH!
giggity giggity giggity
First I was like:
o_0
Then I was like:
0_0
Then I was like:
0_o
i tried doing that now my vision seems blurry 0.o
How do you do that!? I can only do my right eyebrow up like that 0_o
You can't waggle your eyebrows?
o_O
O_o
o_O
O_o
I do it all the time just to mess with people.
(Y)
(';')
(")_(")
[deleted]
In spite of sounding like a doofus, she still said yes. That's a good sign.
Eeeeeeexactly. You can be the slickest talker in the world, but what really matters is if the girl actually likes you or not. It's not like you can talk someone into being attracted to you.
So, asking a girl out can always be a nerve-wracking thing, but the only part that matters is what she says after, not how you said your part.
Good story he had, though! I once asked out a friend... it backfired. Such is life :-)
Yo bitch I wanna throw you on the bed and diddle you 'till you can't see straight. Lets date.
:swoons:
'do we Have to date though?' is also a fun response.
if you girl digs you, she's be head over heals that you actually asked her out rather than just tried kissing her.. she'll totally dig if you are nervous and screw things up and find that very endearing and romantic... just watch hugh grant flicks with a chick if you want to know what I mean.
I think the phrase you're looking for is:
"You the type of bitch that make a nigga want to fuck."
Exactly, seconded. If this girl's your friend she knows 'you' from 'Slick you' already, anyway, and you wouldn't have impressed anyone. You're past the first impressions ;)
As someone who's fallen for three girls so far (2/3 yes's; still with #1) I know how big a deal it is.
Cheers!
'(2/3 yes's; still with #1)'
So #2 was while you were with #1? lol, just messin' with you. I think, err hope, I know what you meant.
I agree. Three weeks ago I went out with a high-school friend that I'd had a crush on for a very long time, but it was her that asked me out. We went out to see the movie Gomorra and had a blast that evening. I've been dating her since!
And ouch for your failure, I feel for you. I did that once and it had such a horrendous ending that I don't think I can ever talk to her face-to-face.
Seconded.
Some girls (my girlfriend included) prefer a guy that's sincere and sounds like a doofus. She always says its sweet.
Me, too!
I fell head over heels for a guy who timidly asked if it would be OK if he could kiss me. It was indescribably endearing.
Too bad his heart-melting shyness and sincerity disappeared a few months later, when he turned out to be a real domineering ass. Never again will I date a stranger.
You were a man-brontosaurus, but at least you got the job done. Kudos to you sir.
He sure wasn't me.
Not-so-clever girl.
Man, talk about a 1 trick gimmick id. I'll give you 100 Internets if you EVER use this one again.
It doesn't need to be! It's a meta-humorous reference. I'd fucking love that account.
p.s. send me the password if you don't feel like using it, pleeease!
User for one day.
But wouldn't a man-brontosaurus be more bad-a? I mean, they could handle like 10 raptors even though they don't eat meat.
Oh yes, I would agree. I would add, however, that brontosauri don't do it like raptors. Raptors strike viciously, brontos sorta stomp around clumsily, swinging its tail.
While the bronto lacks style and edginess, it damn sure gets the job done. Go get her, OP!
a man-brontosaurus kills 10 men-raptors just by falling asleep...
Awwwwwww. She probably knows how slick you usually are and realized when you got all "Um guh buh if uh maybe could uh..." that meant you really care about her.
Or... that she actually cares about him as well?
Or... Both! Everybody wins!
That's the exact mechanism I use and it never fails with people Ive met before. New people take different strategies however.
I once had a good friend that I found myself to have feelings for... one night I just kissed her out of the the blue. We're married now. I doubt that would work in every situation, but turned out well for me.
Same here. Literally married my best friend, which is awesome.
That sounds like the best way to marry someone.
What, literally?
Pretty much the only way for most guys who don't want a subservient trophy-type wife, right? Marriage does seem ludicrous otherwise.
I was surprised to find out a lot of women believe the same thing.
A friend of mine moved most of the way across the country several years ago to marry a girl who used to be her best friend back when they were really little (like ages 3-6) when she lived out there, and who she'd occasionally gone back to visit every year or two since then. One of those visits, in their late 20s, it took a new turn.
friend attack kiss happened to me. my thought was 'o kisses!'. we are dating. (orange arrow for you!)
I've always wanted to be able to do that.
I hope she doesn't figure out how to use google, or that genitals comment might just bite you in the ass.
Unless she's able to identify me as 'electabuzz' I'm kinda doubting any sort of google search would bring this page up.
I am the first google response for "Okay fucko", though :)
Achievement Unlocked.
You googled yourself as fucko?
[deleted]
i remember you from pokemon cards
This confused me:
edit: nm - all good now
writes in notes: when a girl says no, do it anyways
EDIT: adds to notes: make use of phrase "Um guh buh uh..."
Didn't your father teach you anything? (Fun Fact: I was born two hours north of Peter North. Maybe we're related.)
No means yes, maybe means no, and yes means in the butt.
Yeah sorry, that's what I get for writing a short novel without proofreading.
I meant 'no' in reference to her being busy or in public.
I was confused too - I think that the "no" from her may have been in response to the "maybe she was busy or in public" part, not the initial question in quotes?
Ack - edited to fix an astoundingly embarrassing grammar error.
Have one back, kind sir.
There is no thing that might keep a woman busy that takes longer than 1 minute.
You've never heard a woman talk then, have you?
[deleted]
Hey-o!
Shoe sale.
[deleted]
Same here.
I have no idea why you were downvoted, much as I have no idea why I was downvoted, but you may have an upvote from me to restore the cosmic balance.
Because there was no point to his reply. An upvote on the parent post would have been sufficient.
You did it fucko!! Nice. Happy for you.
God that was scary.
In the middle of the story, my heart was actually beating faster. Hehe. I really wanted him to be successful.
I know, as soon as he started saying how he screwed up what he was going to say, I was worried she was going to tell him no. Hooray for happy endings!
When it all comes down to it, its you she likes, not the statement.
Anyways, well done sir.
"Um guh buh if uh maybe could uh..." is soooooo cute when it's sincere, and completely irresistible. Way to go, man!
Seriously? I should be golden, then; I'm really good at all that sort of stuff.
Yeah mate, the flip side to not being a man-raptor is that girls think it's cute when you're nervous, and it shows that you really do care a lot about them and you're not just some dick who doesn't give two flips of a shit one way or the other.
Congrats!
Awesome! Good luck man!
that's all a man can really ask for in this world
I did this recently. She also said yes. I was about as bad as you, but a little better because I didn't know her quite as well.
In any case she said yes. It was a great feeling. We made plans for the next weekend, as we were both getting back to school on the coming weekend.
But then that Sunday when we got back she said "we have to talk." And she fucking canceled because she doesn't date "non-christians." I wouldn't be too phased, except that this girl was probably the biggest cock tease of my life. We had gotten drunk a few weeks before hand, and she practically threw herself at me (I didn't do anything at the time because we were both really drunk, she was a virgin and hadn't even had a boyfriend before), and I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with it. I finally make up my mind, and then she goes all dumb religious on me. What a bitch.
Congratulations! You dodged a bullet.
Ahh that sucks. However, if she is that adamant about religious beliefs then she might have been more trouble than you wanted. Being a strong christian valued virgin would attach her to you like white on rice whether or not you wanted her to.
Yeah. That's why I didn't argue the point when she said that was her reason. Either she was reaching for an excuse, which sucks and means she doesn't want me, or she's actually that religious, in which case I don't want her.
If she was reaching for an excuse, that's a pretty bad one (i.e. not something that reflects well on her, and thus not likely to be something she would have deliberately chosen).
Poor you. I gave you +1 point out of pure pity.
Courage Wolf Approves!
In spite of my prior advice, I'm glad to hear it went so well :)
-edit-
That the result went well, not the asking.
Best tl;dr summary ever.
Please tell me she's a redditor...ess.
Hell yeah, man, glad to hear it! I read your original, but didn't comment, as pretty much everything had been said. I think we all hoped to read something like this out of it. Have fun!
Very nice description.
Btw, this story is very cute.
Sometimes chicks dig ya, thats one thing about being good friends with a chick is that you (always) don't necessarily have to do all the smooth stuff, though it's helpful.
It really depends on how well you know a girl. If you hang out often, but dont know intimate details about each other, theres a huge difference. I have plently of people that I see very often and hang out with frequently, who I'd consider "good friends", but who I truthfully don't know that well at all, when it comes down to it.
Good job, good luck, and make sure she shouts out out "REDDIT!" when you're drilling her... :)
P.S. Don't be stupid and forget to wrap it before you tap it. Be safe and be smart bro. Stay classy, my pokemon-named friend!
Story of my life. There are four or five topics that we (my friends and I) know are safe and we stick to them always. Sometimes I wonder if it's even possible to make friends like that after a certain age.
YEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
YOU GO MAN-RAPTOR!!
Awesome!! Chicks can sense when you're being genuine, and sounds like you were. Totally cool.
Congratulations!
As someone who's dated a few friends, I'm inclined to offer some advice.
In terms of my background, I've dated my best friend twice, and dated people who were already friends an additional half dozen or so times. For what it is worth, I have always valued maintaining the friendships, and I do have six exs invited to my upcoming wedding. (I knew my fiancee for a month before asking her out, but the real friendship developed while dating, so she's not counting for this.)
So my suggestions:
Be honest. You both know each other rather well, continue to build it. (I'm a stickler for this, so it might just be one of my preferences.)
Communicate with each other directly. Don't put people in the middle. If you think there is someone that can help you in times of a miscommunication, then do it together. Sticking others in the middle makes them feel like helping, which is normally awkward and turns into meddling. I've never seen it help.
Continue to value the friendship. Keep it as the priority. If things go wrong, don't do anything that would destroy the friendship. This clearly requires commitment from both of you, and it must be more then lip service. I've pulled it off 6/8 times (the other two didn't want to take part in it).
Consider taking your time, rather then rushing in. At a minimum, make sure that neither of you feels pressured. It's harder to do it this way, but it seems to make everything seem more valuable. (I've been raised Christian and you can blame this idea on that background, but the common cow/milk metaphor seems to support the idea.)
Be yourself, and all the other common dating advice. I don't need to get into this, I'm sure you've heard too much of it before, both the good and the horrible.
I wish you two the best of luck!
*formatting, couldn't seem to get the numbers to autogenerate
Nice. Way to go. Glad that had a happy ending. I was sweatin' for you.
I started dating my wife through very similar circumstances. We just celebrated our 12th year anniversary - not saying you will settle down or anything, just that great things can start from the most humble of circumstance. I'm really happy for you, and was actually thinking of your first post for a while yesterday.
Dude if you get nervous asking your wife out for a date then you either have some serious anxiety issues or you're married to Anne Coulter.
I modded you up.
[deleted]
Whoosh goes to redditors who missed the joke.
Comprehension FAIL
WALL OF TEXT
/checks for bel air
//reads post
///woot!
You should EDIT to: I'm kind of a dork but SHE SAID YES!
EDIT: Also, remember not to scratch your nuts in front of her no matter what. They hate that.
Damn it, I was genuinely hoping your next post would be on suicide watch with you being a slobby mess 'yeah umm...'
:P
joking, joking.
Don't blow it.
Holy crap. I was nervous for you, just reading this post. Good for you. Sounds to me like you sounded "real", and there ain't nothing wrong with that.
Word of advice, now that you've set this ball in motion, take a step back and see if she comes your way. Don't smother the flame.
I give it a couple of months.
Someone is a bitter betty... :P
QQ newb, just being realistic while everyone else is whistling rainbows up his anus
What's wrong with a couple of months?
Sounds like the problem is your massive ego.
I read that as "Bacon of hope".
Ha! I had to laugh at the end. The flustered feeling is one I know all too well. I just did the same thing a couple weeks ago. Hope all goes well! Best of luck to you both!
[deleted]
Good job! :D
Well done! Best of luck to you...
If it doesn't work out for some reason... if she just felt pressured to say yes or whatever and it turns out she's not into you in that way... do not be discouraged...
Part of life is doing this again and again until it works...
Hmm. I thought doing something again and again expecting a different result was the definition of insanity.....
Only if you don't change any of the variables involved.
You got lucky, but well done for having the courage to follow your instincts.
Indeed. Living life as a coward means a life of regrets. Sadly, I know this from experience.
great story, and positive ending...but a sales not a sale until the check clears.
not bursting your bubble, just warning you from experience.
(yes, you still get an upmod)
She'll be tired Monday, so try the phone thing again and ask her for that movie on Tuesday. Lucky you, movies are cheaper on Tuesday... what a coincidence.
Adorable...good on ya mate.
This is awesome and congrats!
Now, if you're not taking her to dinner before, be sure to take her out for dessert and/or coffee or something after the movie. You'll sit next to eachother and not talk to eachother for 2 hours, that doesn't do much to forge a relationship and can sometimes just lead to awkwardness. It's great to go get dessert after the movie because then if all else fails you can at least talk about the movie.
Just my two cents.
Congratulations. I hope it works out.
Hopefully some woman will read your post and realize the mind-numbing nervousness we feel when asking them out.
I asked my best friend on a date over the phone in high school and she threw-up and stopped talking to me for a week or two.
edit: She dated a lot of girls at the time, a few years later we got drunk in my parents front yard and had sex in the grass.
Congrats.
But word of advice from past experience, don't post too many details of your relationship on teh internets, if your username etc can be googled. A previous girlfriend of mine found a random forum post of mine asking for relationship advice and got rather pissed.
But now that I think about it, she must have been pretty psycho to be regularly scouring the internet for posts of mine...
Downmodded for trying to spoil the fun for the rest of us.
wait wait...can you explain that last part please? like the whole thing is about how it went down hill and you failed, then after this huuuge fail-text, you go "It turned out awesome"...explain please!
The story would have been better if you took out all the parts about how super awesome you are.
Lol it wasn't pretty but you landed it man! You should be proud of yourself for taking action. That's a huge victory man. :-)
Good luck , confidence is the key, don't think about it to much just let your natural self flow
You sound like a generally confident man-raptor, and when you were trying to be romantic you tripped up. A lot of chicks dig this. It lets them know that you're being genuine. Congrats man.
Congratulations! I wouldn't count your chickens before the eggs have hatched though. You're not totally in like flint yet. Good luck actually getting that date set up and good luck on the date. I'm sure your advice cup is full, but make a point of making her comfortable and don't let her get 'weirded out' at any point. And when it comes down to actual interaction, be flirty instead of friendly.
Good luck!
You mean "in like Flynn"?
Congrats good sir. I hope things turn out well.
Oh and if they do, please don't post a self.reddit asking "Hey "Name Here", will you marry me??" Everyone does that and it's getting played out.
Congratulations man.
I wouldn't have asked over the phone but I'm glad she said yes! I wouldn't worry too much about sounding nervous, hell she might have found that cute and thought you really liked her.
I still think holding her captive would have been better. Anyway, well done you!
congrats, an inspiration to us all!
Happy for you dude, congrats :-)
I read the first couple paragraphs then skimmed over the rest to the end and thought you had failed miserably, until I saw "And she said yes!" But you didn't! Good job.
Good work dude. But if things get really serious, please promise you wont ask her to marry you over the phone!
rock on :)
claps hands slowlyAnd so you see that how you said it, probably didn't matter. She already knows you well. All that you needed to do was convey the basic point ("I'm into you, wanna go on a date?") and she already knew whatever else she needed to know in order to decide whether she wanted that.
[deleted]
It appears that life happened and you got the happy ending. It's better than anything I can hope for, that's for sure.
Me, I'm still doing penance for the last great...whatever it was that never happened.
Congrats! and good story. Kudos to you & have a great first date!
I thought you were supposed to meet up with her and you were gonna kiss her...
You should have known you were going to sound like a doofus, that's how it goes. I know exactly what you mean about skipping and tone of voice. All that doesn't hurt your chances.
However, you should have done it in person
good job, now you must make a move when you see her next
[deleted]
I still say you should have slept with her best friend.
I'm glad it worked out, having smooth lines to say really isn't the important thing anyway, it's about how she feels about you BEFORE you say anything that makes the difference. I've personally never been a fan of planning out a whole speech for this, cuz, as you saw, it doesn't tend to work. Just have a general idea of what you wanna say and roll with it.
But congrats dude!
To reiterate:
This = our everest. Keep us posted.
Also, if you'd be willing to share "clever things to say that would have made the heart of any woman melt like butter upon hearing them" .... PLEASE DO! I'd like to use them! =D
no man-raptor makes me :'(
Nice work. Huevos grandes.
But it's spelled "ciao".
Not in Argentinian/Uruguayan Spanish! hehe
Stick it in her pooper!
[deleted]
Perfect Bel-Air opportunity wasted.
[deleted]
Don't call her for at least a week. Let her call you, or let her sit and wonder if you still like her. Last thing you want to do right now is show too much interest.
EDIT: Wow, you people are clueless! If you act like you're too interested, she will think you're emotionally needy and insecure, and she will lose interest. But by all means, don't take my word for it, go find out for yourself. You'll be back in the Friend Zone in no time, replaced by a confident, self-reliant man.
That works for women but not for guys.
Also you don't play games with people you like.
Restraining yourself isn't "playing games." It's a sign of emotional maturity. It's also a sign that she's not dating below her ability. A man who fawns over a woman is sending the signal that he's done better than he should be able to.
Speaking from experience I've never had a guy wait a week to call me because they know damn well someone else will step up. Just like a guy will pursue if he doesn't hear from someone.
Any how. The author said he was supposed to meet up with her and I told him to kiss her. Just get to the point. No games.
[deleted]
BJ!
You're a fag.
How appropriate, you're a dick.
translation: she does not want you.
her friend does.
She called her friend and told her all about it.. and her friend expressed desire for you.. immediately making you the most attractive man to her possible because it pisses off her friend to date you since she desires you but you asked girl#1 instead- this will instantly make her more attractive than her friend in rankings. As you get older and wiser (most men just get older) you will realize how very, very, very little a woman's attraction to you has ANYTHING to do with you personally.
you are on a road to hell my friend, a road to hell.
Jesus, what the hell happened to you?
Reality my friend. If that's your response, pray you never have the scales drop from your eyes as it may just blow your mind.
Not every girl is a crazy bitch and not every guy is destined to become a broken shell of a man. I'm sorry you got fucked over.